Writing prompt: WONDER, X-RAY
Provided by: Nicole , a fellow A-Z challenge participant. Please visit her excellent blog.
Genre: Fiction
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I wonder sometimes if I’m as dirty on the inside as I feel on the outside.
But the X-ray shows I’m merely broken.
My forearm has hairline fractures in two places, the doctor says, and I might have torn a bicep tendon. My bones have joined back earlier in other places, and look almost straight.
You want to tell me what happened, the doctor says, it is not natural for young bones to break so easy. Are you sure you fell on your hand? For a second I believe I can stay here for all time, in this room chilled with air-conditioning that smells a little of painkiller gels and alcohol. I’m tempted to tell her. The doctor reminds me of my mother, or what I think I remember of her before she died. But you can’t remember all that much at four.
Then I catch Dad’s eyes across the glass door. I swear he can hear each word from his blue chair outside the doctor’s office.
As I get my arm fixed up, I feel those eyes boring in, the eyes that make me dirty.
On my way out the doctor hands me the X-ray, taking her time about it. I take one last look at my bones, and then feel a small card under the stiff, thick X-ray as I shove it into the brown hospital envelope she gives me.
Call me anytime, she says, but I do not nod. I slip the card in my pocket without looking at it, clutch the envelope, and walk out to my Dad.
Tonight I think I’ll call her. If he does not find the card first.
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Fabulous last lines.
Oh my, that was such a moving post. I could imagine the events you describe, making it all the more chilling. I’m concerned for that kid and it’s not even real. Such good fiction, I tell you 🙂
By the way, thanks for using the X-Ray prompt I gave to you. I’m glad that it was of use to you.
I wrote about X-Rated Movies and chose the topic of “X-Rated” specifically because I know people easily jump to conclusions when reading the title even though my post generally has nothing to do with what they are thinking about in their head, lol.
“But the X-ray shows I’m merely broken.”
Great sentence, Damyanti — one of many in this story.
I liked Bornstoryteller’s comment. I agree. 🙂
That was pretty powerful stuff, you have me wanting to know what happened to her and what happens next, whether she calls or not. Great read.
Unfortunately, that is a scenario that can often be the truth in so many doctor’s offices, today. Well-written and very compelling. You have a powerful gift.
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Short but not sweet. In those few words you had me rooting she’d call. Kudos.
Very well done, almost too real. Makes me want to read more. Blessings!
Really good story, and very sad.
I wrote about x-rays today too, only mine was a true story and not nearly so tragic.
Well done. So sad and, unfortunately, so true.
Wow, that is powerful! Hate situations like that.
You are an incredible writer, Damyanti. When am I going to be able to buy your novels? You surely must have one or two in mind. Have you started any yet? I should have thought a number of these items of flash fiction could build into powerful novels. I truly believe that you have the gift.
Really wonderfully written. So striking and powerful. Well done!
Brief, but to the point. Some adults suck.